just trying not to be sad.

weird point in my life, all over again.

I need stability.

You can't bring that to me right now.

Shitty thing to realize.

Matt was more considerate in the same sort of conversation. I'm not ready. Okay, as long as you're happy Lora. I wish you made me feel the same sort of reassurance.

i'm really beginning not to like you

it's interesting.

Is it weird how good this is? It is. Is it weird how okay I am with it all? It is.

We'll see.

I feel safe just sitting across the table.

But, right now, I just had to call the cops on the couple downstairs because I could hear them threatening each other and I know they have a kid. I'm so shaken up because the cops came to my door by accident and I don't know. I just don't know. It reminds me of something that could have been escalated into that. It scares me.

Even though I know you're probably bipolar now, it still doesn't mean things will work out. I wish it could though.

I don't know what to do.

So my whole family calling me every day asking if I'm bringing a date to the wedding doesn't make things easier.

I feel like I'm losing myself.

I have found in exploring my chakras

in my voice and movement class,

I bury a lot more than I realize.

Working through things I've buried deep isn't easy. I have so many doubts, I really wish it didn't effect me so much.