I feel empty. I jump around from boy to boy and I don't need to. Donnie and I are finally settled together and I'm still searching. I've had such a carefree attitude about boys lately that I feel like my limits are lost. I just feel empty, I realize all I've done I look back and I just. feel. empty. Donnie is the only one who fills me up a little. Especially lately. Stolen kisses in the hall, hands held all around, paying for meals, just smiles. I just miss being in love, so much. I can't wait to be in love again.

I gained 5 more pounds. I freaked out. I'm still mildly freaking out. I lost 3 of them already and I know that my weight is just fluctuating plus I think I'm PMSing and there's a good chance I've gained a half inch in height but!! regardless, I see it on me. I feel it. Freaking awful, getting older. I worked out today and I've really tricked myself into loving salads. I hate how insecure I am about it all though :/

That's my ridiculousness for now.