Tuesday, February 19, 2008


So I've decided to steer away from livejournal. I have too many people I don't like reading things, and its become too much of a drama hot spot.

Fresh starts all around.

Friend groups have changed, the play is over, I'm living my own life now... I cut my hair boldly and spent a few good weekends away.

I feel so great, so liberated. Two months ago I didn't know how I'd get through it all. Isn't it great when you prove yourself wrong?

I have gone through such drastic changes in such a short amount of time. I feel like I've really come into my own, and its nice. Not to say it wasn't difficult.. and I still have my moments. But I really feel good about things right now. I can go to bed at night without someone to rely on to help me fall asleep, I can sit by myself and have lunch, I can do whatever.

Only 2 months until I'm legal, about 5 until I graduate. I am so anxious to leave. To start living the life I have been wanting to live. Which is still really up in the air at this point, but even still. To be on my way to it... ahh.

As for other things, its interesting how people change. How when you step away from certain situations...your perspective really changes. Honestly, it hurts a little. I think I was very good at fooling myself into thinking I was happy. And for the most part, I was. But I settled. Never again will I settle.

I feel like I'm too much for a lot of people to handle. I don't expect that much from people anymore because it seems like I only get let down - but at the same time, what I DO expect always seems to be too much. I'm trying to keep it low-key as of late, and just rely on myself and be okay with that. And so far its working.

I don't knowwwww, I don't know.

No comments: