Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Home for the holidays

Sitting around at home has given me too much to think about. That whole rant should have happened when I messaged you back. But I didn't want to deal with it, I was at school and its so easy to escape you there. I went to Becca's party last night and Andrew asked about you. I hate when people bring you up, because it makes the memory of who you were re-surface and suffocate me all over again.

I feel like I'm living in my own walled in little world lately. I let girls in, sure. But even boys I let in before are shut out. Donnie. Ryan. Kenny. I'm just tired of the same. I want something so specific but I don't think its unreasonable. I just want to move on, replace him like he replaced me. That hole in my heart is still there. Spackled over with temporary patching, but its waiting for someone who fits.

1 comment:

Emma Jepsen said...

god lora.. i know excatly how you feel. stop asking me about him. I love you. Merry Christmas