Aptos

Since I failed to take pictures of last night's events and I have yet to scrounge any up, I'm going to write how I remember it so that I can read it and create visual pictures in my mind later on. The night itself started pretty awkward - standing around waiting for the whole group to arrive then eating dinner and Jeffrey putting his elbow in chocolate pie and me helping him scrub it out in the bathroom.. then we left, and picked up some love, and drank on the way there. Imagine amazing weather, the windows all down in the explorer, blasting good dance music downing swigs. We collected ourselves and went into the dance.. chilled for a while, took pictures, then danced for a good hour or so. Jeff and I were dying, already being pretty warm for obvious reasons then dancing - we were both drenched. But I remember leaning back and seeing the disco ball reflect on the ceiling and just feeling completely happy. The dance went on for a while and we continued to do our thing and then finally just plopped down. On the way out of the parking lot, the little red bull mini was there and we all grabbed some and it made our drinking/dancing with the windows down in the car much more enjoyable.

We drove around to different spots before settling at this guy Sam's. Jeff and I finished our bottle of JD and laughed our asses off at Sam's antics and suddenly I found myself running into his room with a couple of Jeff's girl friends raiding Sam's closet for clothes to wear into the hot tub. The next thing I knew, I was in the half-empty hot tub laughing with a group of people I barely knew, Sam bearing a speedo quite proudly. Liquid broke the ice in this case, and we all bonded. Jeff found his way out to the patio and sat with me... we all laughed more as the first few notes from Blackbird hit my ears and I freak out. The Beatles soundtrack continued as Duncan played over by the table and the group whittled down to two. I laid on the brick divide between the pool and the sad excuse for a hot tub, one hand in each body of water. The stars swam above me as I closed my eyes and let my awareness of the environment around me sink in.

Several hours, drinks, bagels, and blankets later... I woke up with only four hours of sleep under my belt. I attempted to sleep just a little more as Jeff socialized, then we all headed out for breakfast - formal wear and all. We had a very good breakfast at Red Apple in Watsonville, and then finally headed back to change at Jeff's. I spent the majority of the day laying around his house watching soccer with his family, sitting in his backyard petting his sweetheart of a dog, and eating. We went over to Beer Can Beach just long enough for my shoulders/arms to get brutally sunburned. Today the weather was amazing, I couldn't have asked for a better day to be in Aptos. I stayed long enough at the Christerson's for a nice little BBQ then headed out in the midst of the Sharks losing. My drive home was relaxing and 17 was much more enjoyable on the way back.

Speaking of 17 - the mere act of avoiding driving through Gilroy and Morgan Hill - of not passing by your exit - was a really good decision.

These past two days were just full of creating memories for me - even if it wasn't with anyone I'm particuarly close to. I love meeting new people, I love adventures, I love doing exactly what I did last night. Living life to the fullest, no regrets, no looking back. I felt so held back for so long - even when I didn't want to, I held back because I felt like it was respectful. Now, frankly, I don't give a fuck. I'm living my life exactly the way I want it. Maybe its me being a little bitter, maybe its me turning my head and acting like a little girl - but it works for me... and I feel good. I can't repeat how anxious I am to get out of here enough.

**Edit :
Pictures!